Nonversation: A completely worthless conversation, wherein nothing is illuminated, explained or otherwise elaborated upon. Typically occurs at parties, bars or other events where meaningful conversation is nearly impossible.
Smith: What a waste of time it is talking to that guy
Jones: I know, every time I do it's like a complete noversation
Beer goggles: Phenomenon in which one's consumtion of alcohol makes physically unattractive persons appear beautiful; summed up by the phrase, "there are no ugly women at closing time"
When I took her to bed she looked like Halle Berry. When I woke up, she looked like Keith Richards!
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